No offense. But I really don't want to touch you.
It's nothing against you. Really. I'm sure you smell very good and don't carry any communicable diseases... It's just that I'm not very generous with my affection, and I'm sure I'm not the only one.
Which is why I'm blown away by the latest craze in New York City.
Folks in the Big Apple aren't really known for their warmth. Whether you're in Starbucks or Versace, you pretty much expect an abrasive and abrupt greeting from the salespeople. Tourists are long warned to divert their eyes from passersby for fear of being struck dead by the rudeness.
So what's with the cuddle parties?
It's a strange phenomenon my friend "Lady L" found in an article on CNN.com, describing these parties where people shell out good money to lounge around in their PJs with total strangers.
They hug, they cuddle, they even have a warm-up session to practice "saying no" to a fellow cuddler.
It's a movement to help bring together folks who may not be getting enough snuggling.
Now let me start by saying I love to cuddle. There's nothing better than a warm, safe embrace with someone you trust and care about. However, my ability to develop that type of relationship is not contingent on shelling out 30 bucks, and it usually relies on the amount of time I've invested in the relationship.
I'm not a cold hearted bitch. Really. I just don't feel like cuddling with you until I know with confidence that you're not an asshole.
I've already made that mistake a couple times, and I spent way more than 30 dollars recovering from the huge error in judgment.
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